I'd be remiss if I didn't provide some gift suggestions beyond the obvious which are: quality time, a massage, a home cooked meal, or ooh hey... how about not getting on her damn nerves?
80% of the items I'm listing (let's be real, 95%) I'm interested in but surely you can find something for any budget or most any girl below.
$22.50 and available at Dollhouse Bettie.
Let's go...
"I Rub My Duckie" Word. It's a cute, unassuming vibrator. I saw this at a sex museum/exhibit in London a couple years ago. Super precious and probably a great beginner's vibrator. Perfect for the lady who's not ready for heavy machinery. I'd just not stick the head up *ahem* cause that little Swarovski crystal may, ummm, chafe. (Or get lost.) Just sayin'...
$22.50 and available at Dollhouse Bettie.Next! Lingerie. Not crotchless panties or that shit from your neighborhood porn/sex toy shop. (Unless you're into your lady looking like a $2 whore or stank ass stripper.) Vintage... or vintage inspired. Tasteful. Fun. Still uber sexy. Don't forget the digital camera. Maybe she'll let you snap a few pin up style photos of her.
The above ensemble is available at BernieDexter.com for around $150. (That's the whole look. Bra, panties, garter belt, and stockings.) Come on, don't be a cheap-o.
Above model retails for $329.99 on Amazon.com but is surely available at your local Lowe's or Sears. Look at it as an investment and an opportunity to never have to shovel snow again.
The above ensemble is available at BernieDexter.com for around $150. (That's the whole look. Bra, panties, garter belt, and stockings.) Come on, don't be a cheap-o.Moving on. An electric snowblower. No, I'm not kidding. I want one of these and maybe your honeypie would, too. I'm also in the market for a string trimmer and John Deere lawnmower but we can stay weather relevant right now.
Above model retails for $329.99 on Amazon.com but is surely available at your local Lowe's or Sears. Look at it as an investment and an opportunity to never have to shovel snow again. They say "love is... a mixtape." I agree that a well put together mixtape (cd) can earn major brownie points. If you're too lazy or strapped for time to make your own here's one I'm kindasortareally into:
Here you go:
How could you go wrong with that artwork?
Tell her she's your "Dream," "Fairest of Them All," you're in a "love/hate" relationship, or say "Hello (to her) Kitty" with some fabulous jewelry from Karmaloop.com.
What would Valentine's Day be without a card? (Valentine's Day without a card, that's what.) Get one anyway. Check out handmade and magnificent cards by issaino at etsy.com
I'm all worn out. I hope some of this sunk in. If not, you're most likely hopeless and will be alone anyway. (Dang, that was mean. Sorry.) Oops. I meant, enjoy your Valentine's Day. Cheers!
That "Hug Life" artwork is awesome! And thanks for the music... anything from MetroGnome is welcome. I still bump that "Future Funk" in my car to this very day... earlier today as a matter of fact! Nice finds.
ReplyDeletethanks. copping my card this week
ReplyDeleteHehe! Hug Life is finally out! Yes! Good job Les. Good stuff. I love the Disney Couture stuff.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the shout out Les.
ReplyDelete@jbrookinz: Holla at me. I've got plenty.