Thursday, December 11, 2008

Words of Wisdom: Friends

brookz1.jpg picture by jbrookinz<<< J.Brookinz

After many moons I've finally figured out a system for hiring, keeping, and firing friends(that's right it's job). It can be a pretty tricky thing to figure out. You may ask yourself these questions"Do I stay friends with this dumb motherfucker?" or "DAMN, this is my friend but they're always fuckin my shit up!" I mean c'mon, it's hard to tell a person that believes that you're bossom buddies that they should "fuck off" and take a long walk on a short pier.

Here's my method. It's simple

1. Think of all the (memorable) experiences you've had with your friend or so-called friend.

2. File every experience in the following categories: GOOD and BAD.

3. Come up with a percentage for the "Bad" category. (example: Total 100 experiences 75 good and 25 bad. Use this formula ....no wait...just go here http://www.marshu.com/articles/calculate-percent-of-total.php...Stoopid!)

4. Check these charts

If you have a lot of friends chart!
bad times percentage :
0-10%
- keep these people... these are your true homies...Word Up!

11-35% - prolly worth keeping, they might be uncool, unlucky,nerdy, or just lames sometimes. They aren't completely bad folks

36-45%-Hi and bye these fools!

46%- Higher - Toxic. Treat these people like bi-polar suicide bombers. Kick these bidges to the curb. You'll thank me.

If you don't have a lot of friends chart!*

*add 10% to all the percentages above.


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